Breaking the Myth of Sarcasm; It's Not a Joke Anymore!

I realized that I needed to expand on my profile comment about giving up sarcasm, as I am sure you have noticed some sarcastic comments in my blogs. Let me explain.

Several years ago I developed a goal-setting program for my students. It was successful beyond anything I could have hoped for. It was an absolute magical year and I felt that I could teach forever. I have been teaching this particular program for three years and I am, in fact, even more enthused. The program has grown and I have even taught it to adults through some very prestigious organizations. It has truly changed many lives for the better.

When I first started the program there were glitches, of course. The problem was sarcasm. Sixth grader’s sarcasm is usually very clumsy. It is pretty much not even up to the level of slap-stick comedy. It is pathetic. One girl, Leeta, was a master of rapier-like sarcasm, never to me, however. Students are rarely rude to me (exception being Samuel, off meds, in the Diva/Victim/Bully blog below.) Leeta could rip the other kids to pieces and they never knew what hit them. Leeta was the black-belt of 6th grade sarcasm. I would find a glob of gelatinous goo on the floor, which had been a student at one time, and knew that Leeta struck again. That kind of sarcasm took practice.

I invited Leeta’s mother in for a conference. I asked her if Leeta and her brother were sarcastic with one another. “Ayeeee!” was her answer.

“I take that to mean ‘yes’?” Leeta and her brother were vicious to one another and the mother was desperate for help.

I came up with a plan and I have eliminated most sarcasm from my life. How? Why are people sarcastic? They say, and this is the biggest bunch of horse sh**t to ever come down the pike; “I was just joking.” No they weren’t. No, they aren’t. Don’t ever, ever, ever believe that again. It is a lie. I challenge you to challenge anyone who ever says that to you again.

Sarcasm has three components.
(1.) - to make the person being sarcastic feel superior.
(2.) – to make the person being sarcastic feel right.
(3.) – to enable the person being sarcastic to inflict pain.

Whenever anyone uses the “I was only joking” excuse we put it to the test. Are they trying to feel superior? Are they bullying to be right? Do they wish to hurt the other person? A yes to any one of these is not acceptable and the person is being sarcastic. Period.

Here’s the big question though, is it ever acceptable to be sarcastic? Yes! Absolutely! Egotistical overblown celebrities deserve sarcasm. Britney Spears was a great source of sarcasm for my class this year. She was a poster person for my class. They now know what sycophant’s are. They know now that money does not buy happiness or good sense or good taste (good haircut? Mother of the year? etc.) Britney Spears is a public figure, and yes, yes, yes, she is to be pitied, too. I don’t feel bad about being sarcastic toward her.

Here in Arizona we are always being sarcastic about the heat. Yes, 115 degrees is hot. How hot was it? You know the bit. When I lived in North Dakota we would be sarcastic about the cold. You can be sarcastic about political figures, too. That is part of being a celebrity.

But, as a teacher, sarcasm is never to be used against a student. I was guilty of that, and I am not proud. I can only pray for forgiveness for that. I can now expect others not to be sarcastic with me if they are trying to act superior, right or hurtful. That, by any other name is bullying, and that should never be accepted.